The WTF Blanket

I love this video, because I (hopefully along with everybody else) have seen this commercial for the Snuggie & often thought, WTF?!?! Anyway, Enjoy.

To Facebook or Not to Facebook?

I am really starting to hate this social networking fad that is going on over at “The Internet”.  That’s what Daryl & I have started calling it, btw.  You see, by default, I not a very social person.  I have a handful of friends that I’m really bad about keeping in contact with.  Then there are all the other people that I know – how am I suppose to keep in contact with them?  That’s essentially what MySpace & Facebook represent to me . . . A list of people that I should talk to and message, and comment on their cute kids, and make the “Oh, I’ve been that drunk. . .” comment on their pictures.

And that’s just not me.  Don’t get me wrong, I can do it, it just doesn’t seem natural.  So anyway, I’ve been forcing myself to do just that on Myspace for quite some time.  Mostly to family I have on the other side of the country.  Slowly, though, I’ve noticed some are switching to Facebook, and some are sticking to Myspace.  Here in-lies my quandry. . .

. . .Many many moons ago I had my one yahoo email account.  I used it for everything; then when I started getting 2 emails a month from people that I knew and 4,000 from spam and accounts I signed up to, I had an epiphany: sign up to a 2nd yahoo account to use as my sign-up, the the 1st as my personal.  Fast-Forward 13 years . . . I now have 5 Yahoo email accts, 4 Myspace accts, 3 Gmail accts, 2 Hotmail accts, and 1 AOL acct.  That doesn’t include the 3 I have for Deviant Radio, or 2 I use for my “day job”.  See how this has spiraled out of control?  That is what I’m afraid of happening with Myspace (more so than now) and Facebook.  I don’t really converse with enough people to warrant 1/10th of those accts, let alone all of them.

I finally broke down and signed-up to Facebook.  But I froze at activating my account.  I’m not really sure if I want to.  Biff tells me I have to, it’s my responsibility as a tech-savvy web frontiers-man.  My question is, do I REALLY, REALLY need this account?  Also, how far out is the next big site that I just absolutely have to sign up to?  I think I’m gonna be really pissed off if I HAVE to talk to people on myspace, facebook, and (insert site here).  It would be one thing if EVERYBODY moved and I could just trash the old accounts, but that doesn’t seem likely.

Let’s be honest (that was for you Daryl), I’d be really awesome if Yahoo just completely shut down so I could knock out 1/4 of my email accounts all @ once.  It AIN’T gonna happen, though.  Notice I still have an AOL account?  C’mon they’ve been dead for years, and their damn email is still around.

So, what do you think?  Should I, should I not, am I required to?  Let me know in the comments below, or reply to my Twitter account: @deviantradio.

Can’t even enjoy sports anymore!

I can’t handle the commercials shown during football games anymore. I’d like to be able to go 2 minutes without being reminded of my pending medical doom. I’ve seen so many erectile dysfunction spots that by halftime I’m usually just staring at my dick, waiting for it to scream fall over and die! Of course impotence might not be so bad, because according to the “cyalis” commercial a middle-aged man can’t get a bonner without disaster ensuing!(need 36 hrs to find 5 minutes to get off) Which your warned that you can only take this medicine if “your healthy enough for sex”! How am i supposed to find the will to go on when I’m being told that pretty soon my doctor is gonna tell me: “Well Daryl, I’ve got 8,000 different pills that can cure your E.D., but I can’t give you any of them because as a man past 30 your so physically fucked that the stress of that erection will kill you if the meteor dosn’t hit your house first.
But thats only one of the hurdles I’ll face, not only will my penis be useless for sex, i won’t even be able to pee without help!(gotta fix that “growing” problem) Fortunately my bowels will still move, in fact, they’ll be moving whether I won’t them to or not!(adult diapers) I just can’t wait to be the guy standing at the urinal straining with everything i have to piss in vain, while shitting myself the whole time! Turns out the prostate is the Ford Pinto of bodily organs!

This has been a Devious Daryl Venting

1-13-09 – The hypotenuse of DEATH!!!

Biff takes a stroll through the neighborhood, via the hypotenuse of death. Some other shit, too.

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World of Warcraft: miniatures game

This is what you display in your house if you feel that a sign reading: “I’ve given up on ever seeing a vagina in person” just doesn’t quite get the point across.

The last “toys of the season” I think

I planned to end this series around Christmas, but I’ve been cruising the clearance isles and I’ve found some more real winners. These are all along the same lines so I’ll include them on one post, but I will give you separate jokes for each. So that makes you the big winner! Let me know which you prefer

Toy Washing Machine: Can be found in the isle marked “Honor your culture by promoting sex-based sterotypes”

 

My first Ironing Board: “Cause you get more money for the child-slaves that are already trained”

 

Another Toy Washing Machine: “Don’t get caught without a back-up plan if the misses escapes the basement”

1-6-09 – Daryl’s HDHD

Daryl’s ADHD is so vivid it’s HDHD. We also touched on 911, & multi-use electronics.

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Time Lapse – Awe-Inspiring or Puke-Inducing?

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I’m not sure what it is about time lapse, but it amazes me & freaks me out @ the same time. You ever get that feeling? Take the above video, for example. The views are awe-inspiring. Simply, crazy nature views that Man cannot make, no matter how hard we try. On the other hand, it’s like standing still & watching life fly-by. It actually makes me nauseous, slightly dizzy. Now, don’t confuse this w/ motion sickness. I don’t (I’m gonna say typically, for fear of karma) get motion sick. I’ve been drunk, riding waves on the front of a 3-story, floating bar/boat. I’ve enjoyed several free-fall drops from 300-feet up (poorman’s skydive). I’ve done this for a living. . .

I don’t like roller coasters; not b/c the ride makes me sick, but b/c my stomach starts turning in line. You see, my body is a machine. It has been trained for 3 very important scenarios – horizontal (sleeping or fucking), standing still (eating), motion (relax & enjoy the ride). I don’t know how to stand still for 2 hours & not eat – it don’t work that way.
Bottom line is this. . . time lapse makes me want to throw-up. WHY?! Please, if you have any idea, comment, & let me know.

Begin the War of the Inappropriate Cakes

Okay, so last week my buddy Devious Daryl posted a couple of pictures he took of cakes that look like meat.  One was ham, the other turkey.  I guess the theory is there are hame people & turkey people, so this covers both.  I’m not sure if the turkey has white cake & dark cake sections, but I do know it IS a bakery cake.

I believe that I have just stumbled upon (Literally) the meat cake that defeats the ham & turkey cakes (maybe @ the same time).

MEAT CAKE

Since I’m new @ the whole blogging thing, I’m not sure what the standard operating procedure is for pics & credit. So, if you want to leave me a comment about whether I should have posted the pics & given credit or if the link was fine, please do so.

Take THAT Devious Daryl’s meat cakes!!!